A tale of two incompetencies

Let's have a brief recap and review of yesterdays events.

Yesterday morning my project at work was due to be loosed upon the world. I'm it's sole keeper and ultimately all responsibility for it falls to me. And I'm perfectly happy with that. Now, just before I pushed the big red button to launch it/loose armageddon upon the world, I ran through my checklist of things that had to be done beforehand. I'd already checked it before, but it usually behooves to be extra careful with something like this, because the consequences if it went wrong would quite spectacularly bad (for me, rather than the world at large, which to be honest could probably care less). It was just as well I'd double checked, because I found something had not been done, despite the fact I'd previously ticked it off. The reason why I'd ticked it off was rather straightforward. I'd asked one of the database administrators to perform an updated I needed. I'd asked them if it had been done and they said yes. Tick. I'd even received a nice email with lots of text in all caps, with the text helpfully shaded a lovely colour of crimson to emphasise this (I'll admit that I'd been somewhat stroppy with the administrator before, which explains the equally stroppy email).

Now, my launch window, the time in which I could safely launch my project, was narrowing with every passing moment. Not wishing to waste a minute longer, I dashed around to find our database administrators, to beg of them to make the changes I required without delay. As I was in flight, somewhere, deep in the recesses of my mind, I was picturing a scenario in which I explained to them the urgency of my plight, and they recognised this and did what I asked. It's a nice little bedtime story, isn't it?

Instead I found myself being dragged into an argument over who was at fault. I saw the abyss we were about to spiral down well before we reached it's edge, but despite this, despite my proclamation that I didn't care whose fault it was, I just needed it done now (I'm sure I waved my arms in the air several times during this conversation to emphasise my point), despite all this, I still found myself pulled into this nonsensical discussion. They simply refused to take action until they had a culprit to point a finger at, their fingers being aimed at me at the time. My relationship with blame is such that I'm quite happy to court it, whenever it's in my vicinity. It's a pragmatic approach, since once I've conveniently disposed of it, I'm usually free to get on with more important matters. It didn't work in this case. I admitted I was at fault - as I said before, the final responsibility with this project is mine and mine alone, and I do not shirk from that. I should have personally checked these things sooner than I did. However, even after this, the debate continued. More frantic arm waving on my part failed to have any noticeable effect. By this point both database administrators had firmly dug their heels into the ground and were feigning ignorance on the subject. Yes, quite amazingly they were denying any knowledge of what I'd asked them to do, and since they weren't about to do anything about it, I had to run back to my desk and produce the scarlet email I'd received from them on the subject earlier. This email dated from last week, by the way. I'm still not sure whether they were denying knowledge (strenuously denying it at that), or whether they really do have shorter memories than the average goldfish.

Anyway, the act of forwarding the relevant email back to them, as well as a couple of people further up the corporate foodchain, ensured the fickle finger of blame was soon safely oriented back in their direction. And the transformation was remarkable. Let me stop and quote one of the database administrators at this point:

Well, let's make the change we need and then worry about who's to blame later

I could just about have cried out "Well of course you're saying that now, because it's your fault!" in a manner not too dissimilar to John Cleese in full Basil Fawlty mode. Honestly, the air was thick with the stench of rank hypocrisy. I didn't really believe people behaved this way in the real world. I know every once in a while I encounter people with attitudes diametrically opposed to my own world view, but it always catches me by surprise, and never ceases to amaze me.

My relationship with these people is at a new low now, but fortunately for me, I only have to deal with them face to face for a few more weeks. Thank goodness.

Anyway, I'd going to be up north for the next few days, so amuse yourselves again. I'll check back in Sunday evening. See you then.