Will work for praise

If you were to ask my why I do the things I do I'd probably come up with the only answer I can...

Just because.

It's a good, all purpose reason, if not a very informative one. Why keep a blog? Just because. Why put so much effort into the design? Just because. Why do designs for other peoples blogs? Just because...?

However, if you were to press me a little harder (only a little, I cave easily under pressure), I'd probably strive to come up with some better reasons. Near the top of the list is the simple fact that I enjoy these things. In particular, making things. If you'll forgive the new agey overtones, the act of creation is something I get a big kick from. And that's creation of all sorts. A couple of days back I was looking at the down side of my job, which is the inherent transience of what I create - completely overlooking the simple, wonderful, joyous fact that my daily job is one of creation and invention. I get to plough my energies on a daily basis into making things, inventing things even. And I get paid for it too! This is not something I should have taken lightly.

Another one of the big driving forces in my life, which ties in with the above, is that at heart I'm simply a terrible show off. Not in all ways, but darn it, if I've made something that I'm proud off I want everyone else to see it too. This does conflict a little with that core set of Catholic beliefs ingrained into me from a tender age that I may never quite be able to cast off, but I think I've reached a point where I can compromise with myself (possibly even in my favour).

Of course, whilst I should be happy and secure enough with what I do that my judgement on what I've done should be sufficient, I'll admit that I do feel a considerable tinge of pleasure when others like my work too. A sign of insecurity? Perhaps. In an ideal world, I wouldn't rely on anyone save myself for validation, but it's a far from ideal world so I'll take my validation where ever I can get it.

Isn't it nice to have an appreciative audience ;)