Not there but here

I've been thinking about my flat today. I blame Jonathan's recent purchase for bringing it to mind again, although truth be told it's been hovering around the edge of my thoughts for a little while - it was even the inspiration for the Autumn theme on this site. As well as trying to create a pretty looking site I was also trying out ideas for the colour scheme I've been thinking of for the flat. I've been mentally decorating it for months. I've already picked out the sofa, the bed, the flooring and, well everything really.

With all the thought I'm putting into it, you really have to ask why am I not living there? And if you won't then I will - why the heck am I not living there?

I love my little flat. I discovered the area for the first time when I was up in Edinburgh flat hunting and immediately fell for it - it's a beautiful part of Edinburgh, close to center but remarkably isolated at the same time. My flat came on the market two days later. Two days after that it came off the market because I bought it. Serendipity is a wondrous thing.

This was back in March. It's now September, and my flat is still up in Edinburgh. And I'm still down here in London, resolutely not living in it.

The easiest reason to cite for this is everyone's favourite root of all evil - money. As it turned out, buying the flat proved an even greater drain on my monies than I'd anticipated (it's an investment, it's an investment...) and my job down here is consistent and well enough paid (more so that any jobs I think I'll be like to find in Edinburgh, although time will tell there) to allow me to build up my savings again. After all, there's still a fair bit that I want to do to the flat (chief amongst them is a new fireplace and boiler), none of which are particularly cheap.

However, is that truly stopping me? It's possible, although I don't like to believe that money is such a driving force in my life (regardless of whether it is or isn't, I still don't like to believe it).

I think my favoured alternative is that I just don't see myself as being quite ready to settle down. Almost ready mind you (I did buy the flat after all).

But not quite.